Imy Wax & Associates

Part of the col­lege expe­ri­ence is learn­ing to be inde­pen­dent and self-reliant, and know­ing some things ahead of time can help make the tran­si­tion to col­lege eas­ier.


Finan­cial Facts
Besides pay­ing tuition, room and board, and books, col­lege stu­dents often face a mul­ti­tude of smaller expenses that add up quick. Soon after you get to col­lege you’ll start see­ing what the “extra” expenses are going to be. DON”T WAIT to share this infor­ma­tion with your par­ents, it’s bet­ter to tell them up front than add more stress. It’s bet­ter to come up with a plan with your par­ents on how to por­tion the allowance you’ll be get­ting as soon as pos­si­ble.


Finan­cial Aid
Your par­ents have filed a FAFSA to be able to receive the max­i­mum fund­ing. Be advised and edu­cated on what type of finan­cial aid your par­ents received. Not only is it impor­tant to know what type of aid was given but you should also edu­cate your­self on the repay­ment that will be required pos­si­bly from you as well


Banks /Credit Unions On Cam­pus
Your col­lege cam­pus will usu­ally have a bank or credit union located on it. Banks and credit unions on cam­pus are quite con­ve­nient as they can pro­vide infor­ma­tion regard­ing stu­dent loans, per­sonal loans, and check­ing and sav­ing accounts, as well as con­ve­nient cash with­drawals and money trans­fers.


Health Ser­vices and Coun­sel­ing Office
Make sure you know the loca­tion of the health cen­ter and Coun­sel­ing Cen­ter. It’s impor­tant to know this before you or fel­low col­lege stu­dent gets sick or needs help. Know­ing the loca­tion is just the first step: When you find the loca­tion go inside and learn about the ser­vice fees the cen­ter charges, as well as the ser­vices offered.


Vehi­cles: On and Off Cam­pus
Are Fresh­man allowed to have cars on cam­pus? Some col­leges do not have the space to allow every stu­dent to have a car, or they may restrict park­ing access to cer­tain lev­els of stu­dents (juniors and seniors, for exam­ple). Be sure to check with the school’s park­ing office for vehi­cle restric­tions and guide­lines.


Cell Phone Cov­er­age
Don’t make assump­tions. Check before­hand to make sure that your wire­less phone will work on the col­lege cam­pus. If the phone won’t work (or if they don’t have a phone), look for stu­dent dis­counts pro­vided through the school or local com­pa­nies. Spe­cial stu­dent rate plans may be avail­able.


Room­mate Basics
Many col­leges will have had you fill out forms about your room­mate “pref­er­ences.” Know that con­flicts are likely when you move away from home to share a small liv­ing space with one or more new peo­ple. Con­flict is nat­ural, so be pre­pared and don’t be sur­prised. It’s not unusual that you and your new room­mate have dif­fer­ent “liv­ing pat­terns.” Fig­ure out a way to make it work. This is your first of many expe­ri­ences in learn­ing to adapt to one of life expe­ri­ences. Always try to find a res­o­lu­tion. Res­i­dent assis­tants and other staff mem­bers can also assist with con­flicts as needed. If con­flicts can­not be resolved, you can seek a room change, though that request will depend on avail­able space.


Alcohol/Drug Pol­icy
All col­leges and uni­ver­si­ties com­ply fully with fed­eral and state laws gov­ern­ing alcohol—students under the age of 21 may not legally pos­sess or con­sume alco­hol. Every school has their own dis­ci­pli­nary action for stu­dents who vio­late the alco­hol pol­icy. Some include meet­ing with staff mem­bers to dis­cuss the sit­u­a­tion at hand, while oth­ers include par­tic­i­pat­ing in classes. If you are a stu­dent who will need to con­tinue to take med­ica­tions started while at home you MUST find a secure lock­box and a place in your room to keep it out of view. If you choose to share your med­ica­tions you can be expelled when you are caught. Be care­ful.


The Dorm Room
Check with the school to find what items are included in the cost of the dorm room. All dorm rooms will have at least a bed and a desk, plus a closet and some­times a dresser/chest of draw­ers. YOU 9 and your room­mate) are respon­si­ble for clean­ing and dec­o­rat­ing the rooms. If you are able to talk with your room­mate before the school year starts, coor­di­nate what items each of you will bring to fur­nish the room.


Fam­ily Week­end
Check your cam­pus event cal­en­dar so you are not sur­prised when your fam­ily shows up for a spe­cial college-wide fam­ily week­end event. Par­ents and sib­lings can visit cam­pus dur­ing these spe­cial events to learn about the school, and spe­cial events such as sports, fine arts, movies, and games are often planned.

The first rule of thumb that a mom uses in decid­ing when is the right time to involve other peo­ple in car­ing for the child is after there has been a period of time that she has been able to observe the com­fort or dis­tress level of that child… in other words how “fussy” is your child? How well do you know what makes the child feel com­forted? Do you under­stand the child’s dis­po­si­tion? Is it easy going, or does she/he like to sleep a cer­tain way? At a cer­tain time? Do you have a sched­ule and struc­ture in place that would be easy to fol­low by some­one else? For exam­ple, the time to sleep, to eat, to play, etc. When you and the child have a “rhythm” together then you know you are ready to intro­duce a new per­son.


Sec­ondly, pick­ing that other per­son can be a chal­lenge more than you think.
There is noth­ing sweeter to a fam­ily mem­ber, espe­cially a grand­par­ent, for exam­ple, when they are called upon to help in the care of their grandchild…well, maybe. The present gen­er­a­tion of grand­par­ents, while eager to help, are also very active in their own lives. Many are still work­ing, or enjoy­ing the fruits of their labor. They want to con­tribute but feel con­flicted. They want to “fill-in” but do not nec­es­sar­ily desire to give up days each week, all year. Are they the right peo­ple to count on to be con­sis­tent as care­givers?


The child needs a per­son who, from early child­hood, does not nec­es­sar­ily “sub­sti­tute” for the mother but is some­one avail­able con­sis­tently, intro­duced to the child slowly, until they too under­stand the “rhythm” of that child. I remem­ber inter­view­ing care-takers when my chil­dren where very lit­tle. I needed to start back to work but wanted to feel reas­sured that this new per­son was on the “same wave-length” as my child. This took place years ago before hid­den cam­eras. I had hired this person(s) to come over for a few hours when I knew my child was “up.” I didn’t stay in the room with her but sim­ply observed from a dis­tance. I was look­ing to see whether this per­son tried to make my child con­form to her time table of when to play, be fed, or be held, and when my child was ready for this to hap­pen.  If you have invested time in get­ting to know your child, you will see that you can observe and ana­lyze this dif­fer­ence.


It is always dif­fi­cult to “let-go” of your child, no mat­ter how old they are. But the best time to “share” your child is when you feel con­fi­dent that you and your child have “bonded.” You are able to respond to your child as though he/she has been with you for­ever. It’s when you know that your child rec­og­nizes you to be the pri­mary giver, the per­son who can be counted on to return. Chil­dren can develop a timetable of their own that allows them to feel secure, too.